Somewhere within any of the chapters of The Book of Proverbs there will always be a reference to the human being’s lips, tongue, teeth, mouth and speech.  This is so because God full well knows the power of man’s spoken word.  It is indeed one of the three great powers given by God to man.

As a matter of fact, God warns us that the power of life and death lies within the tongue.

God’s Wisdom shouts at us from all of The Book of Proverbs on practically every one of its pages.  We would all be very wise to heed to His advice and counsel regarding our speech.

Proverbs 17 :  28   NKJV:

(28)  “Even a fool is counted wise when he holds his peace;
          When he shuts his lips, he is considered perceptive.”

As I reread this Proverb, a smile spreads across my face.  It is humorous to me because I have to smile to keep from crying at the stupidity of other people I have encountered over the past 36 1/2 years of my life.

I do not believe there is a single exception to what I am about to discuss as regards people in general,…. unless a person grew up in a box and was never let out of it.

But just let me ask you one simple question.  Have we not all been around or in the proximity of such a fool, of such a “motor-mouthed man or woman who gives the impression of being an expert in any and all fields?

Such a person appears to be incapable of keeping their mouth shut, of holding their own tongue,…of hearing a discussion whether invited into it or not and eagerly verbalizing their own position on an issue or voicing their own opinion.  These type folks seem to want to make their ridiculous comments even if their statements fail to add value to the conversation or present any new and relevant information.

It is always so rude and disgusting to have to listen to such an uninvited “forced-upon-you” point of view.

People who conduct themselves in such a way are most usually very short of common sense.  They are generally devoid of good social manners and have little if any social etiquette.  They are more pathetic than anything else.

My etiquette training as a youth growing up in our home was such that you were taught never to speak unless first spoken to.  My parents always taught we children to have an opinion on a topic of discussion, know what it is,…how to articulate it,… and know why you stand on it,….but…keep it to yourself unless some one else specifically asks you for your opinion.  Should that actually occur, you were to stand up, speak up using good, brief and proper English, and then shut up and sit down!  Their instruction and training was simple, brief, and extremely effective.  I do so appreciate the value of their teachings as my life has unfolded over my many years.

Everyone has the right to their own opinion, but not everyone has the right to thrust their opinions upon the ears and minds of any and every body within earshot, unless a listener exercises his own right of choice and leaves the audience.  I might point out at this point of the discussion, that whenever you are voicing your requested opinion, you should never get upset if a person departs from the audience.  Just because they may be through listening doesn’t always mean that the speaker is through talking.  It is O.K.  Listeners have the right to express their own approval or disapproval in a variety of ways.

Rarely will a group of people, regardless of size, all have the same opinion or position on any given topic of discussion.  Remember, God made us all different, and it is human nature for folks to disagree on almost any subject.  

We are all wired differently.  What may be crucially important to me, may well be completely unimportant to you.  On the contrary, that which you see as vital may be of absolutely no concern to me.  The key to good effective human communication and camaraderie is tolerance and good social manners.  A good dose of common sense also should play into the “mix.”  

Never forget, if another person’s words, position or opinion gets too much to bear, you can always vacate the premises.  You can always leave the conversation.  You are not planted.  You are not a tree.  You can always move!

There is a cute story told about Calvin Coolidge, the thirtieth president of the United States.  He was a rather quiet and soft spoken man who actually spoke very little.  He was wise but not outspoken by any stretch of the imagination.

A reporter at an attempted interview with the President, did not accomplish much.   Here is a transcript of the conversation:

Reporter:  Do you wish to say anything about the war threat in Europe?
Coolidge:  No.

Reporter:  About the strike in the clothing factories?
Coolidge:  No.

Reporter:  About the League of Nations?
Coolidge:  No.

Reporter:  About the farm production problem?
Coolidge:  No.

As the reporter began to leave the room President Coolidge unexpectedly called him back and said, “Don’t quote me.”

There is some very good knowledge and advice that can be gained from this short story.  Here it is….Never allow yourself to feel or be pressured into saying something that you do not want to say,…or into saying something when you don’t feel like talking.

Silence is not a “lack” of communication, and it can be a very effective one at that.  The loudest noise in the universe can sometimes be complete silence. 

All too many people just want to say something or feel compelled to say something just hear their own voice, or to satisfy themselves into thinking they have had some input into the conversation.  That kind of forced entry into a discussion rarely carries any significant meaning or benefit.

Now listen,….If you have some good and valuable new input to a discussion and you genuinely believe it will add value to what has already been said, then by all means voice it, share it, enter it into the record.   Otherwise there is really no pressing need to take the time to rehear or listen to the same information again only from a different person’s mouth.  Be considerate of those having to hear the same old story over and over again.

There really is no need to continue discussing the same thing over and over without arriving at some sort of conclusion.  Such useless rambling without any substantive content is known as unnecessary verbosity.  Most usually it comes from people who offered little, if any, real value to any given conversation.  They just want to be heard.  These type conversationalists are famous for gibberish and even foolish or ignorant statements.  May I offer you all a little common sense,…a little cowboy counsel:

It is much better for a person who is called a Fool to withhold his comments, to hold his tongue on an issue of discussion, and to remain silent, than it is for him to open his mouth, voice his opinion, and remove all doubt or question as to his personal status.

If you practice this valuable advice, then you will most certainly Never Pass Up A Chance To Keep Your Mouth Shut.

Follow this sage advice.  It will surely serve you and all of us very well.

Peace and love to all of you……Poppa Bear