Please permit me to share with you some things I have learned as a child that have helped me and served me extremely well in my adult life. Thoughts,…mental thoughts,…precede every word and action a human being takes. Thoughts initiate all the things that your body actually does. You first think about the things you wind up doing. It is for this very reason that you will continually hear the comment….think before you act….think before you speak….think, use your brain. Napoleon Hill wrote a best seller book entitled….“Think and Grow Rich.” A Truth of Life is that Thought always precedes results.
While I was growing up as a child, my Dad used to always admonish me to “put my brain into gear before putting my mouth into motion.” In other words…..“think before your speak, son, you will always be glad you did!”
We three children in our family were required to learn the English language and achieve the highest school grades in the classes of English and writing (penmanship). My father would always say to us,….“if you ever expect to amount to anything significant and accomplish the really great levels of success in your life,…..you must be able to communicate well with other people,….both verbally and in writing!” Dad continually demanded that we three kids knew how to properly speak and write with great diction, proper punctuation, and good voice inflection. It wasn’t an option,….it was a requirement. If you failed to do what he directed, he simply made you to re-do it until you had performed properly and correctly. At the time it was happening, none of us really liked always being corrected or being required to rewrite our lessons or school papers, but Dad would always say to us….“You may be upset with me today, but the day will come in your lives when you will thank me for being so strict with my demands on your performance.” Well, indeed that day came. Thanks Mom and Dad for the strict requirements of learning how to write and speak well.
You see friends, when you use improper English you kill the chances of being listened to and taken seriously. Listeners are totally turned off when a speaker or writer butchers the English language when they are attempting to communicate with others.
If you use improper English or choose incorrect words, or use wrong verbs, wrong verb tenses, wrong sentence structure, bad punctuation, and make many other grammatical errors,….you lose listeners or readers. When you lose your audience, it makes no difference whatsoever what you are attempting to say. In the world of business, the ones whose attention you lose first are always the greatest, highest quality, and best educated people. Those are the very ones you are attempting to reach and influence. Don’t shoot yourself in your own foot,…only because of poor speaking or writing skills…..
The solution to all of this self imposed misery and loss is first a good education in the use of the English language. Such education can be obtained either publicly or privately. It is your own responsibility to get educated. Find a tutor if necessary. Listen to educational CDs. Listen carefully and learn from other people who happen to be great communicators. Learn the intent and the content of the material that good speakers and writers use to get their points of discussion across to their audiences. Learn the use of timing and delivery of voice inflection. Study…prepare…and most importantly think about what you want to say before putting your mouth, your keyboard, or your pen into action!
Don’t stutter while you are speaking. Don’t use excess words. Don’t use too many long pauses between thoughts or sentences. Never use bad English words to connect other words or thoughts like…“and-ahh,” or “ahh, ” or “um,”…or “well-ahh.” Don’t keep repeating the same word in every sentence. An example of this mistake is overuse of the word “like.”…For instance never say: “well I mean “like” we were just going “like” down to the beach when”like” a really big truck came racing by us “like” really fast!”
When communicating with other people, keep your sentence structure simple and easy to understand. This can best be achieved by using only one-thought sentences. Whenever you are speaking or writing to people remember that brevity is always the best policy as most people are visual listeners and learners. Only the very best of speakers and writers can hold the attention of their audiences for extended periods of time.
The Stanford Research Center tells us that 89% of what people learn is visual. Complex and compound sentences are self imposed limitations on your own ability to communicate and therefore influence other people. It goes without saying that since leadership is nothing more than influence, then whatever detracts from one’s ability to influence other people automatically reduces their influence and therefore their leadership capabilities.
Human beings learn primarily from observation. So whenever you read a book, listen to a CD, or watch a DVD, or simply listen and watch a speaker of any kind,…pay attention to the manner and way they communicate their messages to you. Learn how they deliver their message as well as to the content of their message.
Now comes the most important part of this discussion. All of the know-how in the world is totally useless unless and until it is put into action. Practical application is the “litmus” test of how much and how well you know what you are doing!
How do you get “good,” “very good,” or even “Excellent” in the presentation and performance of the knowledge that you possess? Yes, you guessed it…You practice and practice and practice some more. Practice is simply preparation for excellent performance. Preparation can be employed anywhere at anytime and in any situation you find yourself. Try it,…you are going to like it! Practice good speaking skills whenever you are alone. Find a place where there is no one around you who can hear you practicing your communication skills. Whenever you are where there is no one listening to you practice,…there is no need or chance for anyone to hear, comment, or embarrass you. Speak up in your practice session. Use good voice inflection, drive your points home with emphasis and/or voice volume control.
Use your God-given imagination. Talk to trees, fence posts, vehicles, and other imagined listeners. Learn to develop and use body movements to add to the effectiveness and emphasis to your spoken message. Practice what you want to say well whenever you are alone. There is no self consciousness about what and how you are saying things when no one else can hear you practice words and verbal delivery skills.
A closing thought…..
Thoughts precede all of your words. Words precede all of your taken actions. Actions precede all of your performed effort. Effort always precedes accomplished results.
If you want to change the results you are experiencing in your life, then you must first begin to change your thoughts.
New, better, and more positive and creative thoughts within the confines of your own mind are the keys that unlock new exciting words, actions, efforts, and accomplishments in your life!
Change your thoughts and you will change everything else in your life!
Peace And Love to All of You……………………Poppa Bear